Domestic Tranquility
Dear Dyke Whisperer, My wife expects me to clean up after her. It wasn’t like this before. When we first moved in together, she always did her share of housework. Now, if I don’t do it, it doesn’t get done. Any suggestions?
Tired in Tulsa
Dear Tired,
Invite your wife to a favorite restaurant or prepare her a nice dinner, whichever makes the most sense in your world. Enjoy pleasant conversation. Afterwards, tell her you appreciate the fact that she [fill in the appropriate chores here; I just provided some examples] works hard, maintains the vehicles, takes out the trash, etc. List all the chores she DOES perform. Then, tell her in a calm voice that, despite her efforts, you need her assistance in maintaining the house/apartment. Tell her that it would REALLY help you if she were to [again, provide the relevant list] pick up her clothes, assist with the laundry, clean up after meals, etc.
Stay calm. Don’t accuse her. Be appreciative of what she does. Be specific in what you need help with.
